Mixed Species

Hairy + Colt 45

2011-10-22T02:31:00.001-07:00

Perhaps we should kick off this product description off with a bit of an explanation. Your beloved Hairy McSpecies has been laying low for a while. In fact, all of the Mixed Species guys have pumped the craft brakes a couple of times in the past year.

Enter Hairy's newest muse.

Somewhere between being born again and a premature mid-life crisis Hairy stumbled upon monster truck racing. In a matter of days Hairy landed a personal sponsorship with Colt 45 and a professional sponsorship with Dodge. To honor Hairy's first Monster Truck Rally win driving "Vomitron" we are proud to introduce our "Ignorance was Bliss" tees.

You are Welcome!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Beat Boxing with Stephen Hawking aka pt.2

2011-03-10T16:33:00.000-08:00

Now at the same time that Hairy’s Universe has sexploded and Poppa is literally riding the hot new culinary wave of street meat, Face McSpeces, his fine lady and plethora of model spawn sons pull up stakes on the mainland and head to Hawaii. They quickly acquire an island of their own and establish the “Slayin’ w/ Face n’ Stephen School of Surf” or SWF&SSoS as it becomes affectionately called by the locals.

Most of you don’t know this but Stephen Hawking and Face have been long time friends going back to their days working for the Cerebral Palsy Dance Party Network, (CPDPN) a somewhat successful early cable channel. CPDPN featured people living with CP busting moves to the swinging sounds of multiple DJ’s mashing Mr. Hawking’s love of 70’s disco and Face’s passion for Kraftwerk with a soft focus on Pet Shop Boys for the CP slow dances break down. MC Hawking would then bust out some burly beat box in his Speak n’ Spell so dope it made many question who they actually are and why they even exist. The ill fated CPDPN bit the dust after loosing their Speak n’ Spell sponsorship following Stephen’s decision that he could contribute more to the earth through his career in theoretical physics than genius beat box workings on a child’s toy. In the wake of Stephen's departure Face forever regreted asking "the Hawk" to take mushrooms and run around the forest, finding their true selves. Face tried his best to combine the two and retain Stephen at CPDPN but the result yielded paradoxes yet too massive for the human mind to consume. Years later little had changed between the boys and with their ever tighter families came to a fine decision that the rest of their days would be spent in the love of water education and enlightenment on the warm sandy beaches of Face’s island in Hawaii.

.... to be continued.

What happened to Mixed Species .... part 1.

2011-03-03T22:09:00.001-08:00

A.) You don't want to know.

B.) You won't believe us when we tell you.

C.) Our story will change your life.

Sometime in the spring of 2010, unbeknownst to us we were set upon by a sea change. Was it the winds from the bog of eternal stench of the "double dip rainbow" sulfites found in the foie gras wine one of Poppa nymphs made or maybe the neck of a prehistoric rhino thrusting his long dead horn miles beneath the crust of the earth in hopes of luring a worm to that sweet spot between his balls and anus? What ever it was an unexpected hiatus from our general exploits and shemanigans ensued. Through the following seasons each of us held almost as little contact with the world as we did each other.

In late spring 2010 Hairy left in haste on a rocket leaving only a note in his wake. It read “Suck your own fucking roe mayo, you downs corporate robot slutz!” The remaining earth bound Mixed Species boys though bewildered, quickly attributed Hairy’s actions to another drug crazed spaz freak session.

At the same time, Poppa’s ever growing concern for the plight of working class gamers reached a multi headed sirens fever pitch. He proceeded to roll out a fleet of mobile gamer rehab clinics delivering mead and aged under cooked meats to the work places of ren faire/larper/dm/wow crack heads experiencing withdrawals. Alternating his attire from that of Kaylee Frye (Firefly), Sorsha (Willow) and a trans Chaotic Good Elf, Poppa brought many good memories to the struggling gamer crowd hit so hard by recent economic downturns.

Narissa, shield holder of the Vulture Prince writes to Poppa:

“When I saw your dirty, rapey van show up emblazoned with the word “HUZZAH” in goats blood on the side I knew my day would soon bettereth. Never has such a beast shown me that level of unadulterated joy. Long dead are my youthful Hagrid fantasies in the wake of Poppa’s soul crushing trans-Orc passion geyser. Thrusting with the power of almighty Zeus, I was “moyster” than the ocean when you parted my seas and stole my pearl. My legs still shake like a scurvy dog with the thought of walking your plank or stank.”

That last word was hard to make out by way of a ketchup or blood stain. This is only one of the many letters we receive daily at Mixed Species HQ from his legion of ren faire/LARP/DM/WoW/gametard freakfest fans!

Poppa also makes a mean corn dog as the above-mentioned “rapey” van doubles not only as mead wagon but a fairly brutal lunch cart. Though pass on the foie gras wine, past consumers of that unknown liquid are not limited to that of Pat Robertson, Charile Sheen, Moammar Gadhafi a plethora of people wearing magic underwear and all but Corporate of the MS boys.

(to be continued next Friday!)

On another note, We're not gonna make any promises for 2011 short of that we'll be around more and plan on keep all y'all more up to date with our misadventures. Some things to look forward to will be dirty details about porking fellow etsians, art shows about arming whales, sexy felt, birdhouses and maybe a few neon monsters.

2010-04-29T10:24:00.000-07:00

Hey Ho!

We have (and by "we" we mean Hairy McSpecies as the rest of the Mixed Species guys watch) been very busy recently working on a collaboration project with the lovely and talented Shawn Wolfe! As part of Shawn's National Gross Products line launches, we have been hand printing a set of posters and t-shirts to compliment this un-visionary.

So NOW is the time to get rid of that Creed poster in your living room. No one is buying the fact that you kept it out of "irony". We have packaged as set of five posters that will give people a little something to talk about the next time they come over. Currently Face McSpecies is hooked on the "Gladness Feeling". In fact he recently got caught in the bathroom having some "Gladness Feeling" and now has come up with a more unique setting / position for his "Gladness Feeling".

Whether it's a "Kick in the Nuts" or "Fish in Elephant" design you should immediately be able to spot who are your friends and who are your frenemies!

Have Fun!

-the Mixed Species guys-

One New Year's Resolution DOWN!

2010-02-22T21:55:00.001-08:00

So, Hairy McSpecies and I go through random bouts of organization and business-like goal setting. Most recently we decided to get "serious" in 2010 and make some more Mixed Species cashish as we seem to spend it faster than we can make it. (insert Mixed Species Summit '09 link here) One of our business goals was to start making ourselves much more Blogasmic! So we headed down to blogger to create a Mixed Species Blog only to find out WE ALREADY HAVE ONE! OK, we promise to take better care of our blog and the one or two people who check to see if it's still on life support. Here's a quick list of blog topics and potential truth-hoods to happen this year in the Mixed Species compound:

1.) New tee and poster designs out the "YayWho".
2.) New collaborations with some of our heros.
3.) Mixed Species guys to CURATE (that's right CURATE) first gallery show.
- working title will be "Engorged National Pride"
4.) Plan yet another Mixed Species Summit.
5.) Follow through on the "Donkey Show" photo shoot idea.
6.) Create more Mixed Species videos.
7.) Face McSpecies might actually make something besides another baby.
8.) Poppa McSpecies to open his Bea Arthur Museum.
9.) We all salute Corporate McSpecies as he finally fell into a marriage!
10.) Begin writing Mixed Species book. "Doing the WRONG things the RIGHT way!"
11.) Oh shit, I almost forgot. Make MORE $$$!

We love you all in the face and look forward to meeting a few folks this year as another goal is to hit the craft show circuit harder than last year.

XoXo
Face McSpecies

Mixed Species to Host Weekend Kegel Clinic!

2009-09-29T00:50:00.001-07:00

OK, maybe it's not always better to do what you want now and beg forgiveness later but we do apologize for our lack of blog updates. We have been cranking out a ton of new products and will show our blog some much needed pampering. Here's a little preview:

1.) Mixed Species Guest Artist Series! Our guest artist collaborinos are going splendidly! We are getting ready to launch another new design. Here is a shot of just one in the series.

2.) MixedSpecies all up in your twitter! Come follow us on twitter. It's like a 24 hour, 7 day a week, 365 day a year car wreck. Or maybe we'll get smart and figure out how to do the little twitter updatey bloggety thing.

3.) Check out our growing customer appreciation photo section on flickr. You wouldn't believe what our customers send to us.

That should be more than enough for now. We've also finished off another 5-6 new designs and items in our etsy shop so feel free to browse!

Have Fun!
-the Mixed Species guys-

BONCH!!

2009-05-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

We know, we know we've been awfully quiet lately. Well sometimes it takes a lot of focus to create a masterpiece like this! We are proud to announce the first release in our signature scented series of products called BONCH!

Not only that but the product photos show Hairy McSpecies taking the lead in the best male tramps stamp contest going on at Mixed Species HQ!

Let us know what you are thinking!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Which logo for Sound Collector??!!

2009-03-14T11:13:00.000-07:00

As earlier posted on this blog and several other MixedSpecies media outlets, we are starting a new project based on sound collection and sampling. (creatively titled Sound Collector) We've set up a voicemail line for all of our Cult of Mixed Species minions to call in and let us know what's on their minds.

Will we turn them into another Mixed Species one-hit-wonder ala Moustache, into a Mystery Science Theateresque weekly podcast or immortalize your words on refridgerator magnets we don't know. Hell, there's a good chance one of us will get what every you say tattoo'd in a special place.

We've worked ever so intimately once again with our good friend Mike Fairchild aka Mike Fairchild to come up with three different logos for this project. Which one should we choose? Leave us some feedback love and we'll be eternally grateful!

Have Fun!
-the Mixed Species guys-

Things that make you go hmm

2009-02-26T19:54:00.000-08:00

I've been there and that is not at all how I would describe my experience.

Random message phone

2009-02-24T23:28:00.001-08:00

1-541-752-0238 is our random message/sound collection line

Please call as many times as you like at what ever time you like and leave us what ever sound or message you like.

We'll change the recording often for your entertainment.

What what?!

2009-02-24T05:57:00.000-08:00

Last week Jessica of For The Birds (Etsy) let us know that she had seen the above pic of Hairy on Reddit. Shortly after that it was picked up on a few other sites and as of now it has over 130,000 views! The notes people have written about this gem have just been the funniest thing you can imagine. On Digg I read about the wolf shirt people felt Hairy should don and that it should have a hole cut out over the breast nipple area to show his crusty tattoo. This pencil drawing soon to be featured on antiques road show was found on www.thing-a-day.com and is the finest example of American folk art we've come across. On another note there was some debate as to whether the sign was real or not, we did not make it but found it in lovely Albany, Oregon. To us a sign like that is born from some genius we've not yet tapped into though we aspire to it heartily. This image and many other like it can be found on the Mixed Species flickr page.

Have Fun!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Mixed Species Brother from a different Mother!

2009-02-15T21:36:00.001-08:00

As Face McSpecies seeds the Mixed Species garden of San Francisco he couldn't help but be "amazed" by the talent of one photographer. Pedro L. Pedro could very well be a Mixed brother from a different south of the border mother. Pedro we salute you! Keep takin' your damn cool photos!

Peace n' Bacon Grease!
-the Mixed Species guys-

Hot Pounding artist On Artist Action!! Reviews Beady Monkey

2009-02-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Hailing from that small western sea of "goberment" workers and prisoners comes Beady Monkey one of Esty's coolest jewelery peeps. In dissing Beady's home base Salem, Oregon we should not forget that it's also home to many a fine sanitarium including the one (soon to be torn down) featured in Kesey's One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Hairy is now filming the remake playing the Nicholson role (click here for details). Beady has long been tightly held in our hearts, buying random stuff from us and often including fun pictures with her feedback. Short of liquor, other inebriants or copious amounts of undeserved accolades funny pictures are a sure way to make our moufs foam and manties moist.

Beady's shop is not only full of fine jewelry but leads one down a variable shopping tunnel of love. You'll walk away with a book in front of your snack pack or weak knees after sucking on sights like the Rapture of Love pendant or Elle, also known as "the bone maiden". The subtlety of romance in Beady's shop is sprinkled about like the flower pedals that encircle Poppa McSpecies round spinning bed (Poppa's sexy setup). Take the Little Locks of Love earring set for instance, the beautifully ornate silver tone lock and key are adorned with a small heart each resting on a red glass disc.

Beady is not a bashful gal and takes her admiration of nature on with the same crushing vengeance that she brings to world of love. Like a flaming harpy bearing her breast of malice to the dark force of the mass production overlord. She gores the dark lord with her deft staff and screams in gargles whilst drinking from his foul offings, we all kneel in awe of her unrelenting strongth.

Whoa whoa whoa!

Back to nature and animals and such. Beady's group of bird pendants really blew us away! We agreed that if Morgan's tree had birds like that of Beady's Pretty Bird or Wise Owl, King Arthur would have hung himself up and fed his own eyeballs to those sharp looking avian pimps. Come on now an obscure reference to the movie Excalibur should be no surprise at this point in the paragraph.

The Luck Be A Lady Tonight necklace also caught our eye in hopes to roll a custom Beady order for Luck Be A Cup Of Gravy tonight. We have a TON to learn from Beady! Check out the last shot in this series! Now that is how you deliver.

As a side note in an otherwise completely coherent review the Red Umbrella in Beady's Umbrella series reminds us of this great Kostars song of the same name. Also the Aqua Mans Treasure listing is beautiful but not at all what our drug addled minds had expected.

Beady Monkey slays us on all levels and we gleefully give her five out of five freshly washed guaranteed thumbs up!

As a reminder please click on all the colored text as we go to great lengths to provide quality links for your viewing pleasure. If you're interested in getting your own purchasable guaranteed positive review from Mixed Species click here.

A feeble attempt to clear the air prior to the trashings of grocery store print rags

2009-02-01T08:30:00.000-08:00

So I helped my dear old friend Jessica Simpson rock a couple of duets on her recent state fair mini tour. I didn't think it would raise such a stink but I guess there's just not enough failed plastic surgery or expensive divorces to keep the pages full these days. I'm not porking her with any commitment, she nor I are pregnant and yes I did and do support the high waist jeans with double leopard belt. Her shirt is where I join in the fashion dissent, it should have had cascading waterfalls of glittery tassels and if I had my druthers it would have been pink to match the uggs I picked up for her. Of course she didn't sport em as they were a bit on the tight side.

This jazz is hitting the stands and now there is blood in the water, already and I can see the shark fins jutting up like rockets over Gaza. With next weeks release of the Hairy N Geri (Halliwell aka Ginger Spice) duet this should be a feeding frenzy. Just let me set the record straight I'm not cashing in my social capital on Hollywoods sweepings, I'm just rolling around with friends having a good time. Lets also just say at the out set no one has a deathly illness, is getting married or divorced, yes there is lots of sex and lots and lots of drugs and none of us are going to rehab or writing books about god or the straight life EVER. EVER!

That said keep posted for the Hairy N Geri stuff that's to be out in the next week give or take. Tell all the tabloids that unless they give us what we want we're not buying their sloppy rags. Think I can speak for all when I say, we want some dirty pics of a Joan Biaz, Roy Orbison, Paula Abdul and Jonas Brothers orgy. Yes I mean Roy now, don't knock till you try it the meat is falling right off his bone.

Have Fun!

Hairy McSpecies

It's just another day peeps

2009-01-30T09:36:00.000-08:00

Some artists have the uncanny ability to ferret out truths from our cruel and ironic world with just a few simple words, Shawn Wolfe and Kurt Vonnegut (rip) come to mind. Headlines or the "random" grouping of headlines often offers another vantage point into the irony of human toils.

Today I was struck when I read the top two headlines (above) on the Yahoo front page.

Economy shrinks 3.8 percent: biggest drop in almost 27 years

Exxon Mobil breaks it's own record with $45.2 billion in profit

This quote from Kurt Vonnegut came right to mind "nothing makes billionaires of millionaires like war and economic depression". I then walked to my kitchen to see an art piece from Shawn Wolfe that made me smile in light of my prior thoughts. It's a carved sign that reads "I'm Nauseously Optimistic".

Starring into the abyss and thinking "you know what sounds good, a BLT with extra mayo and a deep tongue kiss from a mildly drunk plus size model".

Let's French!

Hairy McSpecies

Humans put monkeys throwing poop to shame

2009-01-27T19:19:00.000-08:00

Frankly nothing can brighten our day like good signage!

We've touched on this theme often in light of the joy universally shared at the expense of people's public humiliation. A notion not at all lost on our Hairy McSpecies!

Our first sign is one we've long adored. Located on the west side of I-5 just south of Salem, directly across from Enchanted Forest. We are late in the game grabbing a pic of this keeper as the mossy green beard of our dear pacific northwest has dulled the subtle nuances of redneck rattle can action. With the economic outlook as poor as it seems, this artisan should have ample interest in reiterating their lack of desire to sell this coveted property to the throngs of potential buyers. As a side note this trailer, fifth wheel, mobil weapons lab, feed trough, virginity disposal or what ever you want to call it is located just a few miles from BeadyMonkey, the focus of our next purchasable positive review.

Our second sign comes from a fine "barbar" shop in bottle tossing distance of the local Salvation Army. The real gem of this sign is not the inevitable vision of an elephant happily clipping away at the hair of some dude a la Rin Tin Tin but the realization that this simple sandwich board sign marks the funking Home Of The Fade. In lieu of this fadetastic signage we thought we'd include this rad youtube vid.

New years nonsense.....

2009-01-04T20:14:00.000-08:00

Above are two photos of my favorite shirt in the entire world! This gem was bestowed on me by a hip ink rep I met while in Seattle known as Spanky. Spanky was so cool in fact that he not only introduced my early twenties self to Mr. Bukowski but was also a infrequent guest on KCMU's (now KEXP) "Shake the shack" the finest of rockabilly shows one could hope to hear. Here a decade later I'm still sporting this fine tee though it's merely a ghost at this point. The second picture above was actually taken through this poor relic! Seeing that I'm only shy about a twelve pack before I beerbelly hulk out of the bad mother trucker, I've decided to break a long standing tradition in it's honor. Up until this year I've made an annual ritual of resolving to never resolve anything to myself, in this was I never disappoint myself as no one is more keenly aware of my lack of self discipline than myself. Hold that, my wife prolly knows better but I would be a close second. That said, I Hairy McSpecies will not stop wearing my Bukowski shirt till it falls off my body or my wife hides it in a feeble attempt to save some vestige of her near exasperated dignity (she does have to be seen with me from time to time).

Hope everyone had a fine New Year!

Have fun!

Hairy McSpecies

If you drink a mass amount of bloody mary's then puke in your hot tub at three in morning do not expect the filtration system be able to clean it.

Brief Jerky crowned "Lil' Internet Superstar" on Revision3 TV!!

2008-12-30T10:04:00.000-08:00

Oh yeah, we've been laying low to focus on our Holiday sales but we are back with this little internet tidbit. Our very own Brief Jerky was recently featured on Revision3!

"Putting the Assy in Classy"
-the Mixed Species guys-

Sometimes it's hard to see a good pair of shoes go

2008-11-11T17:30:00.000-08:00

And sometimes it's just too easy!

I've been sporting the above pair of checkered Vans for the better part of five years now. They've supported me through much work, rad rock shows, fantastic art shows and many a Mixed Species photo shoot. The latter of which will ensure they live on beyond their physical life, most notably matching my dress in the you park like shit and oil whore sticker listings. Just look at the holes, ink and dirt rubbed into those bad boys, no one could contest the love that has anointed these work horses a shoe fave for a lifetime. Now just a shadow of their former selves my peers often joke "you can't stop wearing em now, they're almost sandals". I'm kinda a sick shoe dude, not in the sense that I have many pairs but more that I only really like em when all the sides get rounded off and the sole has formed to my funky feet and shnarfy toes like spam in the can.

Okay enough blathering bout these old dogs, the new digs make it hard to feel too bad.

Last Saturday night Sara and I stayed at the Jupiter attending what was one of the best rock shows I've seen, Dungen (these guys are about the closest thing to rock gods you've never heard of). Prior to the gig we headed across the street to a nard crushing gallery The Grass Hut and from across the room I heard the siren call of the coolest slip ons in the history of the world. Designed by Bwana Spoons and produced by Dekline these are better than walking on the backs of angels! Bwana's killer whale image swimming all over with much gold and red trim, if there was a super hero that skated he would sport these bad mother fathers ten sizes too large with rhinestone socks and a unitard, so no one would miss these rad stompers. If you look close I glued some of my own gems on the side!

Best shoes ever!

Thanks Bwana and Grass Hut

Here's a little taste of Dungen

Mixed Species 08 costume contest BIG Wieners!

2008-11-04T11:32:00.000-08:00

A hard decision born from many a contentious debate, each wrought with blood boiling anger and extremely high milk fat content has brought us to this years BIG WIENERS.

1st place goes to Atomic Glass Works with the depth defying Krakken of which we have nick named "Release the Krackalacken Krackalacka". Atomic Glass Works will receive a crisp $100 bill and #1 of the Let's French poster series signed and numbered by Hairy McSpecies

2nd Place Is a tie going to Shannons 1970 for Flower Pot Kid and Pile of Leaves Kid. We've often thought about burying our kids beneath flower beds and in piles of leaves. Shannons 1970 will receive a $50 credit from the Mixed Species etsy store and #2 of the Let's French poster series signed and numbered by Hairy McSpecies

3rd Goes to Spin Swim for Ari, The Unicorn Master. Hairy said of this fine costume "damn that's the face I always hope to see looking back at me after I snort a huge line of coke from my unicorn engraved mini mirror" and with that 3rd place was filled. Spin Swim with receive a free Purchasable Positive Review and #3 of the Let's French poster series signed and numbered by Hairy McSpecies.

We are late in deciding/announcing the big winners and we are sorry for that hold that we are the Mixed Species guys so suck it.

In other news, today is election day and we can't shirk our public duty to mention it in some form or another... So go vote as many times as you can! Vote early, vote often.

Please remember, no matter what side you're on we'll get behind you, cause hey we love those darn dirty mud flaps!

If the thought a literal ton of hairy man meat sprinkling themselves with those cheap packets of au jus powder doesn't get your motor running you may take solace in the up coming family film "Who's Nalin Paylin". Poppa and Corporate McSpecies agree "Who's Nailin Paylin brings it in a way Brolin and Dryfuss just couldn't", no offense to Josh or Richard but I think we're all glad they didn't. Enjoy!

Thanks to all who contributed!
Have Fun!

Glue Guns Tape Wallet

2008-10-28T09:40:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while two shops get together and make some magic, no not that kind of magic you dirty bird. We're talkin' products not etsy storgy session! In this esty store tag team Tape Bubba has honored us by using our Glue Guns > Guns sticker in one of his fine tape wallets. This is a fat hog of a wallet, we could keep enough blow in there to get across six south American borders and still have room for most the overdue bills from home and abroad. Go check it out here and then cruise his shop maybe buy some stuff maybe even convo some nice thoughts. Bubba likes soft talkers with strong dirty and sorta mumbly words. When we talk to him we pretend we've got a mouth full of garlic corn skin on mashed potatoes then try to recite the lyrics from peace train backwards in a drunk voice. Don't forget to clap!

Thanks Bubba

-the Mixed Species guys-

Halloween Contest is coming fast!!

2008-10-23T23:07:00.000-07:00

Our flickr costume group is growing fast with a bit of submissions starting to roll in. We've been busy our selves hammering out some costumes to make some smile and most cringe. Check out the first two creations above! First off we have Oliver Bolan's Rainbow Bat, he came up with this one his own. Though it could easily be misconstrued we've got to admit to being stoked when Oliver pinked the pink fake fur to join the rainbow felt. Next up is Laura Ingalls Gene Wilder and if this is not a case of Hollywood gone rural then that freaky banjo kid from Deliverance is Face McSpecies brother uncle.

If you've not already joined our flickr costume contest then get on it for a chance to win some of our fine crap and a crisp $100 bill sent to your house.
Go here!

Mixed Species does Mosaic Masterpieces--Hot Pounding Artist ON Artist ACTION!

2008-10-20T07:23:00.000-07:00

Ever wonder what became of the cutters back in school? If they ended up turning out work like C. Brennan of Mosaic Masterpieces then maybe all the crying in the mirror watching their eyeliner run listening to the Cure and working at the mall food court after school may very well pay off. Sorry there's still no excuse for the goth shoes. No not those ones, the elf ones.

Hairy McSpecies is the proud owner of a C. Brennan piece, a radical depiction of Twiggy the most glamorous female model ever. We all know who the most glamorous male model is?! Twiggy gave Hairy this fantastic mosaic of her after leaving him heart broken at the altar, it's a sad story that Hairy has yet to recover from. In the above photo, chillin' before a romantic fire Hairy reads a few Pablo Neruda poems to "his" Twiggy while washing away the tears with beer (he serves Twiggy's in a wine glass). Later he'll stumble to bed to smell the pillow twiggy last used better than ten years ago to see if he can still smell her. His guest appearance on last season's America's Next Top Model has brought up some strong feelings and it's a tough recovery.

Twiggy's just the start of the pop that spews forth from Mosaic Masterpieces massive musclely pulsating creation organ. Her poppy glass tentacles stretch from Seattle to Philadelphia. The city of brotherly love (ha) with a stunning mosaic recreation of Robert Indiana's famous Love. She then grabs us by the hair like rag doll (yes we like it!) and drags us all the way to New York City, adding some sharp edges to Roy Lichtenstein's Love Gun.

What do Jimi Hendrix, George Harrison, Jim Morrison and Madonna have in common? Other than mountains upon mountains of drugs copious amounts of alcohol and bagging mass chicks they've all been the subject of mosaics from the C. Brennan of Mosaic Masterpieces. We think it's fair to say that any average self loathing self absorbed artist, musical or otherwise would be honored to rendered in glass by C. Brennan's adept hands.

From the amazing intricacies of the George Harrison piece to Wood grain reveal in the Hendrix piece we are happy to give C. Brennan five out five guaranteed severed thumbs up.

You can also find C. Brennan and her fine work at these lesser known interweb joints
myspace
flickr
etsy
C.Brennan is also showing paintings at Glam Boutique in Albany Oregon through November

Darwin + Spock vs. Captain Kirk + River Dance = Mixed Species

2008-10-17T20:33:00.000-07:00

People often wonder how we choose which new idea/product to release. The best way to describe this kind of process is a booze induced combo of Darwinism meets Spock vs. Captain Kirk in a vicious rendition of river dance.

Here Face McSpecies demonstrates the weathered look of a winning idea. One note to keep in mind for further research. Beer bottles don’t break as easily as it looks on TV!

Hey, maybe we can enter Face into a Halloween contest!?

“We are here for you!”
-the Mixed Species guys-

Yo Gabba Gabba-----Best kids show ever!

2008-10-14T19:51:00.000-07:00

Some of you with kids may already be hip to the thumping tower of radness that is Yo Gabba Gabba, if not take a little break from all the political garbage puking out of your box and tune in. I watch it with Oliver Bolan when I have the chance and have concluded it's may be the coolest kid show ever. Great Space Coaster, Muppet Show, Mr. Rodgers, 321 Contact, Reading Ranibow are just a few great kids shows I remember loving from my youth, chances are good that Yo Gabba Gabba will be the first show I remember loving from Oliver's youth. I wish I could say that I find more redeeming kid programming but it seems not to exist. Maybe I've just blocked mass amounts of total shat shows from my memory but I think it's more likely that contemporary kids television is disproportionately idiotic mind numbing robot consumer manufactures. Thank goodness Scott Schultz and Christian Jacobs dropped Yo Gabba Gabba on us! Check out the website here then enjoy the rad videos below.

And Don't forget Biz's beat of the day

Mixed Species 08' Halloween Costume Contest!!

2008-10-10T11:11:00.000-07:00

As October got going we became kinda freaked that Etsy may not host a costume contest so we decided to rock one our selves! Everyone is invited!

Our goal in doing this contest is to have fun! Well and shameless self promotion but that goes without saying, so we take that back. Feel free to invite anyone you want to join, the more the merrier. There is no cost to enter and feel to use our group to promote your art as much as you'd like. Above is our entrance to last years Etsy contest, Gene Richard Simmons you can also check out the video (below) of him singing "Heavens on Fire" with local rock gods Saintan. Gene Richard was very drunk that night, as a matter of a fact shortly (yes that is freudian) after that video ended he ripped of his camo undies and exposed his funky junk on stage. Gene Richard was fired as spokesman for Deal A Meal & Kiss Army LLC. shortly (that's twice) there after.

In hosting a super loose event like this on flickr we are able to invite everyone regardless of etsy membership, paypal account, country or any of that jazz. In truth you don't even need a flickr account as long as you know someone who does and con them into submitting your costume for you.

Here is the Mixed Species Halloween Contest flickr group to join/enter.

Here's how it will work (so we think)

Prizes

1st place a crisp $100 bill & #1 of the Let's French poster series

2nd place $50 shopping spree from the Mixed Species etsy store & #2 of the Let's French poster series

3rd place a purchasable positive review on our blog & #3 of the Let's French poster series

Rules

Enter as many times as you like.

There are no categories so you can enter what ever your mind and hands can create, that said please be moderately nice to animals.

Costume must be made mostly by hand.

All entries must be rad or some lame they are rad.

All entries must be in by 12am 11-01-08 (changed so people only have to put this crap on once).

Winners to be announced 11-03-08 on this blog and everywhere else we post, did I mention shameless self promotion.

The Mixed Species guys will contribute costumes but will not be competing (yes Corporate McSpecies that's directed at you bitch).

The Mixed Species guys are the judges so feel free to attempt bribes as I'm sure it wouldn't take much. A bidding war of bribes might be good plan.

Etsy is hosting a costume contest this year so by means enter that one also!

Mixed Species does WrenWillow in some HOT Artist ON Artist ACTION!

2008-10-06T20:29:00.001-07:00

WrenWillow -

Like the phoenix designed for one of her baby onesies, WrenWillow will soon rise from the offal and debris of websites selling baby and children’s wear to heights of stardom! The Phoenix is one of the favorite symbols of our very own Face McSpecies. Face has often cited the legend of the Phoenix in explanation of his past love life. It’s only through the fiery crash and burn that one is cleansed enough to go out and make the same mistakes again! But we digress …

Upon first inspection you can’t help but notice WrenWillow’s beautiful artwork and the complete mastery of form of dragonflies and butterflies. As a shop of four guys our only suggestion would be if she made them robot dragonflies and butterflies. Or better yet, robot dragonfly and butterflies flying out from under a bloody rainbow holding the heads of the recently departed mates. (whoa, too much metal music lately) Our guess is this would be great fodder for the next deep clean found in a Billy Mays infomercial. But really, robots rule but robot dragonflies rule even more!

The MulberryPink Unicorn Kids Tees are perfect for both Isaac and Oliver McSpecies. The Pink Unicorn icon is a subtle reminder of what the Mixed Species guys spend our Etsy dough on. Our newest forms of alternative means of transportation are both Flying Unicorns for air travel and personal submarines when traveling by sea. The bottom line for us boils down to our mobility having the fashion sense of Freddy Mercury minus the reach arounds.

Another phenomenal WrenWillow product are her Diaper Covers! We'd suggest her diaper covers dyed in brown & yellow are perfect for us new fathers. We would coin the term "baby camo" for this particular tie died cover wash. Imagine we'd save a ton of water and energy not having to wash these covers. The stains would never show! We'd also suggest making the diaper covers reversible to double the wearing potential. Turn inside out and reverse to wear four times before “restaining” the same stain. We submit, it may not get any better than this!

Once again we are happy to award WrenWillow five out of five guaranteed Mixed Species stained diaper covers!

Have Fun!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Finally some new shit from -the Mixed Species guys-

2008-10-01T22:37:00.000-07:00

Often cited as single-handedly reviving the 70's scruffy tennis look we call Bjorn Borgasmic, Hairy McSpecies is seen here modeling our newest release "Let's French"!

We are pre-releasing this soon to be Holiday classic as the "Let's French" tagline has really become our Mixed Species mantra of late. With the current political, economical and environmental developments dominating the news we've decided it's better to take the ostrich and the sand approach. Instead of the ostrich it's our tongue and instead of the whole in the sand it's your mouth!

or as Hairy McSpecies himself says:

In times of many steadfast and conflicting opinions we need words that will unite us in respect and fellowship. We believe "Let's French" are those words! Sartre said in his classic No Exit, "Hell is other people" and that may very well be true at any moment other than those spent oral spelunking in some one's moist cave. This is no time for "henny penny the sky is falling" peck kiss action. Now is the time to move decisively, like you were still on recess hiding behind the gym in a knock out session overwhelmed with passion rid with dread over the coming break bell

This is the same fine image featured at the end of the m0ustache video.
A very few have been printed on green medium Bella womens fit shirts.

Let's French!!

Art we own and love, Shawn Wolfe

2008-09-27T21:20:00.000-07:00

So stoked! We finally received the title painting "I'm Nauseously Optimistic", we scored it at Wall Of Sound's show for Shawn Wolfe. The Shawn Wolfe painting below "I'm Nauseously Optimistic" is entitled "These Colors Run", the quote is from William S. Burroughs. We picked that up in Portland at the Grass Hut, a great gallery owned by two super cool artists Bwana Spoons and Scrappers. Shawn's art has been a fave of ours for a longer than we knew he was the one doing it! He is super super prolific, don't believe then go buy his book Uncanny or see his posters or go here and be blown away. I think Negative Land album art was the first taste I had anyways it hardly matters by the time I was living in Seattle the whole place was covered with posters of his Panic Now campaign featuring the Incredible Remover Installer. All of this was apart of Shawn's Beatkit as he explains in this excerpt from an interview with CrownDozen.

Beatkit™ was a brand without a product that promised to cease and desist in the year 2000, which it did. Beatkit's mantra was "the general gloss of falsity is our only product", which was a long-winded way of saying "Beatkit: it's all lies." So despite what I say it actually did have a product, the RemoverInstaller™, which was a baby rattle type of device except with no rattle and no moving parts. It had no function or utility of any kind, except to inspire an ad campaign around itself, Panic Now. Panic Now was similar to other real-world ad campaigns, except it dispensed with any pretense to romance or amuse you and instead just focused on the naked howling truth of all ads, i.e. "Stop whatever you're doing and look at this. You don't even know what it is but you need it. Don't try to reason your way through it or out of it, just panic. Now.

Have Fun!

Hairy McSpecies

Cozy Cabin Creations in the middle of Hot Pounding Artist On Artist Action!

2008-09-21T07:47:00.000-07:00

Cozy Cabin Creations is a stone cold fox esty seller of whom creates plush wearable goods for the enitre fam. Cozy also rolls her own blog and walks amongst the stars as a member of Cafemoms Etsy Moms. We've been trying to infiltrate Cafemoms Etsy Moms group for a while now so we are taking this review as a sign that our natural pheromones have wafted their direction.

Secretly luring distracted parents to their kids by way of the Football Team Pillowcase Dresses

Cozy Cabin creates beautiful, subtle and powerful tools for parents to leverage a little family unity. Poppa was wondering if he could get an adult sized NFL pillowcase dress as his wife always seems more in the mood when he puts his NFL pillowcase over his head.

Please keep in mind we've used the terms like "parents" and "kids" rather than moms, dads, daughters or sons as we are well aware of families not always fitting into the nuclear family box. The McSpecies family is as far from norm as families get, Katherine Dunn wrote a book loosely based on our family called Geek Love.

While checking out Cozy's fabulous etsy store Face McSpecies went from his usual dashing handsome self to near tears. We all understood when he explained that two of Cozy's products brought up hard memories of a Eugene ren faire love story gone awry. Seems Face fully embracing the ren faire lifestyle was drowned in mead with a chaw full of sour pig when a beautiful maiden wearing the U of O pillowcase dress beckoned him with her siren call to the back of a horse stall. It may have been the poor lighting or double vision that got Face there in the first place but neither were around to hide the truth in the morning light. Poor Face woke snuggling tightly with the not so fair and even less so maiden under a blanket with the same print as Cozy's A Family Outing Buck Fawn and Doe Rustic Table Runner. Face humming Lola boogied out as quietly as possible with his heart in one hand and dignity in other, this time it was the siren call of the mead barrels that caught him off guard. Face woke the next morning back in the horse stall and not alone.

Cozy's fabulously plush Eyelash Scarfs are finely crafted on her loom of eternal cremglocksnar . Yes we made up that word, we define it as; a golden encrusted object that spews forth the cream of crafty goodness like a pornicorn (2) on speed. After that fine definition all should grok cremglocksnar fully.

Corporate was just smitten with Cozy's aprons. The Transformers was his fave while Oliver is leaning to the Go Diego Go model. Sorry folks just gotta say that as Oliver's father I've watch many Diego shows. I can't think of a cartoon I would rather see have their vocal chords ripped out by glass laden flaming battle axes dripping with hot acid. Say click, take a pic!
Poppa was not about to let us leave off without sharing his excitement to find the Matching Mommy/Child Christmas Aprons. Let's keep it a secret but Poppa plans to score this one for he and his little guy.

We give Cozy Cabin Creations 5 guaranteed pounding "smell my" thumbs up!

Missemilygene's HOT Artist ON Artist Review!

2008-09-19T10:53:00.000-07:00

Missemilygene aka Ashbury Lane

It’s not too often we come across a shop with the
diversity of not only highly polished graphic design
capabilities and services but also a homage to
George Carlin’s 7 dirty words! This “review” is
going to be fun!

Magnet Sets

The insect magnet set would be a great way to capture
the various entomology found in the pants of the Mixed
Species guys. Our code word for this product would be
“Crotchstacean”. And what better a way to redirect
attention from your ugly fridge than Isaac Hayes?
Better yet, if you have a “thing” for overrated wall
eyed manorexic singers there’s always a
Thom York magnet!

*note to selves –start a doom metal Radiohead cover band
called WallEye! Groupies!!

Jewelry – Ear/Necklace sets:

After explaining the “Crotchstacean” project to the
various Mrs. Mixed Species we’ll definitely be in need of
Missemilygene’s jewelry! We’d start with the
AquaPod earrings or perhaps the Bang Bang earrings.
Although the irresistible innuendos of giving Bang Bang
earrings would probably lead us right back to the doghouse.
Maybe we play it safe and go for the
Dimensional Olive Glass Pendant.

Skeleton Keys:

Don’t even get us started on the Skeleton Keys! Where did
they come from? Hairy McSpecies suggested they may be used to pick chastity belts and
Face McSpecies wonders if missemilygene is some sort of
closet diary hacker!?


Graphic Design

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=5070168

We’ve been looking for an accurate way to capture the “essence”
of -the Mixed Species guys-. Primarily we’ve experimented
with the senses of taste and smell but perhaps portraiture
would be the best way to capture what IS Mixed Species. Maybe we can get one in scratch and sniff.

This, our new friends is how you get FIVE out of FIVE
Mixed Species thumbs up! Yes, there’s only four
Mixed Species guys. (you do the math)

Have Fun!
-the Mixed Species guys-

MOUSTACHHHHEEEEEE!!!!!!

2008-09-16T23:13:00.000-07:00

Hairy McSpecies flaunts his hair growing abilities in this latest Mixed Species video ending in a quick preview of our newest "Lets French" design!

Art we own and love, Arbito

2008-09-14T12:40:00.000-07:00

Along the way we have been lucky enough to meet and befriend some fantastic artists. With that in mind we've decided to share some of the art that each of us own and love with our fine readers.

Arbito is from Seattle and is one of the nicest most talented cats one could happen to meet. I was introduced to Arbito and his wife Snaggs (also a fantastic artist, we'll get to her in the future) through my wife in 1997, we've been following their radical popish creations ever since. I often joke to my wife that Arbito must be some sort of closet engineer as much of his art is not just painted but is multi dimensional.

The top piece is titled Motion Notion and is far and away my favorite thing in the house. Please keep in mind this is coming from Hairy McSpecies and I not only have most of the MS stock in my house but a full keg on tap in my garage. I took a quarter angle shot of Motion Notion so you could see the layered rainbow concentric head shapes of the headband sporting hippy fox.

Next are two in a series of 14 (or more!) characters that Arbito has created, you can check out more in the series here. The coolness of this series just blows me away! Arbito has created a silk screen with a bicycle on it, he prints the same bike in the same place on rectangular wood painted white then paints one of his fabulous characters over that. Super cool super genius!

We also own a couple of rock posters Arbito designed a number of years back. They hang in my office and I did not have time to photo them before posting this blog. Needless to say rad work for rad bands. The poster Arbito did for Aphex Twin can be folded like origami to make the A shape of the Aphex Twin logo. I know dudes, totally mind blowing!

view Arbito posters here

You can find out more of Arbito and his fantastically talented family on myspace

Arbito

The Hiberts

Don't forget flickr!

Cosmic Hobo rules!

Below are two you tube vids of Arbito art in action

Precisin Muffer found!

2008-09-12T09:26:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it, two (Turdles was the first)radical "fun with english" sign finds in one month ! I think I'm huked on fonix. The great thing about signs like this is that we don't have to do anything but hang out and enjoy them. Muffer from urbandictionary.com (check out the other fine muff terms to the left). Another random and funny find this week was this youtube video of some spanish rocker kids air banding (or something) to Grasping Air a rad song from our good friend Travis's band Yob.

We just had a Sporkasm!!

2008-09-08T20:09:00.000-07:00

Both Hairy and Face McSpecies have always had moistness for the spork. They usually start out as an innocent spoon, but once our pheromones kick in, the spoon quickly becomes erect! Any shop that runs the gamut of Blueberry Pie in Beer Cap Pendants to Shaved, Pierced (complete with pubes) pieces gets our attention. In fact, you should have seen the amount of mayo slung around the room as Hairy McSpecies shook his head in disbelief!

We chose to review Etsy shop, The Curious Spork using a Rorschachian interview format. Face and Hairy McSpecies will review several wonderful products from The Curious Spork by sharing what comes to their minds and nether regions when admiring each.

Wakey, Wakey Eggs and Bacie and Eggs Earrings

Face: This reminds me of my favorite wake up call of “wakey, wakey hands of snakey”. My mom was funny.

Hairy: Breakfast IS the most important meal of the day even when eaten at 5pm. My favorite wake up call was “wakey, bakey” ….ah um I forgot the rest.

Pink Dice and Sea Green Faux Pearl Bracelets

Hairy: Had I found this shop sooner, every classy lady in my life would have received this bracelet for Valentines Day.

Face: looks down at the pink dice and sea green faux pearl bracelet he received from Hairy for Valentine’s Day. WHAT THE!?

Tetris Charm Bracelet

Hairy: This bracelet gave me some mean flash backs of skipping school to go to a friend’s house and slay a few Tetris lines not to mention scope out his mom!

Face: HA! I’m betting they created “Tetris Effect” based on Hairy imagining THOSE two shapes fitting together.

Creepy Severed Toe Keychain

Face: I’m thinking this would make and awesome addition to any little kid’s trick or treat bag! I can just see the look on that little face as they discover the severed toe nestled between the box of Nerds and the Sweet Tarts.

Hairy: Plus it’s much nicer than the old razor blade in an apple trick! That one is better saved for near-blind rich grandparents.

So at the end of this review the Mixed Species guys HIGHLY recommend you spend some time perusing this shop and rate it Five out of Five hot sporkings!

“Let’s French and Have Fun”’

The Mixed Species Guys

This review has met all standards of weight, measurement and grammatical good taste put forward by Corporate McSpecies

Hairy McSpecies on new 90210!

2008-09-07T11:50:00.000-07:00

Adding a healthy dose of sexy to the already engorged barf bag cesspool that is the CW line up, I will make a brief but timeless guest appearance on the new BH 90210. This could possibly be the easiest role I've ever taken! I'll portray "Biff Lang", a long haired, headband sporting, van driving, pot smoking drug dealer that rolls in a perpetual circle around the Peach Pit and West Beverly H.S. servicing the latest crop of rich consumer sheep and their lonely moms. Now that's not it mind you! The fine sheep or kids or what ever, have taken it upon themselves to attempt to solve Biff's problems. One of them finds Biff's picture in their mom's (Jennie Garth) West Beverly year book and by reading between all the "Have a great summer!"s, "Keep cool"s and "Stay Stoned"s is able to glean that Biff was once Brenda Walsh's (Shannon Doherty, also guesting) boyfriend and up and coming pro tennis star. Biff had acquired a strong addiction to high waist stone washed jeans and when they went extinct from the 90210 area code, Biff's life light soon went out. Viewers can expect a climactic resolution to these issues in an epic 13.5 minute closing scene of Biff slowly unzipping a pair of acid washed jeans with a waist almost to Shannon Dohrety's neck. Yes, the unzip takes place in the back of Biff's van while parked in front of the Peach Pit.

Don't come a knockin' !

Hairy McSpecies

Foxy cave girl with a bone for Me!

2008-08-30T09:59:00.000-07:00

This fantastic card from KRYSTAN! came up in the forums sometime ago. I wanted to receive this tasty little nugget more than any card I've come across. Now being a proactive person willing to step into a burning pile of turds to save a chunk a doo with an interesting shape, I decided to take matters into my own hands and get this card sent to me post haste. I was left with a burning question that has come to us all at one time or another, "if buying a card for myself who would I like to send it". It didn't take long before our brother at arms, Rev Ross came skeazing though like a giant electric eel at a water babies class and I had my girl bone-y. Thanks Rev and Krystan for the best self orchestrated card receiving that I've had yet.

Have Fun!

Hairy McSpecies

HOT Pounding ARTIST ON ARTIST action. Mixed Species vs. levityinbrevity

2008-08-25T22:06:00.000-07:00

levityinbrevity

We have the good fortune of reviewing this SLC based artists shop and quickly realized her shop had us thinking of one thing … Baby Making! Speaking of baby making is it just us or is “trip-hop” very good baby making music। There’s nothing like a little Portishead, Tricky or Morcheeba to increase the size of the Cult of Mixed Species. Well trip-hop and Rob Zombie and DeathKlok. Now hold on – before you get all up on your high horse let us explain. In the following “review” we will take you from “pre” to “during” to “post” baby making all based upon products found in levityinbrevity’s shop! So, join us!

First of all what they say about “the quickest way to a man’s heart” is true. It’s nudity. Well nudity and food. Usually at the same time. The Chef Chicken Country Cooking Apron is a beautiful little garment that leads us to wonder has anyone ever made Chicken Fried Bacon? Serious ... how good would that be? When we perfect the recipe for Chicken Fried Bacon we'll be coming back for one of her Oil Cloth Vinyl Bibs, Adult Sized!

We also scooped up the magic cookie recipe from her shop। We are guessing if we are rolling SLC style hopped up on these cooking AND wearing our lucky underwear chances are we could be lucky enough to wake up foggy married to ten people including our own sister and someone else’s! This reminds us of one of our favorite questions from a Facebook fan. (before we were kicked off) “Is polygamy legal in Corvallis?” This comment still brings tears of pride to our eyes.

Hairy McSpecies remarked after checking out the Pink Leopard Tote that he’d like to find one of levityinbrevity’s beautiful bags over his head before a passionate session। In fact he’d look so good there would be no need for the dimmer switch! We can only assume Hairy is referring to a passionate solo session.

Look at this little brown corduroy dress। Seriously it’s so cute we are considering making babies just so we can have a little Mixed Species girl to put into it. This is much closer to the truth than most might think. The Mixed Species guys are so virile that we’ve actually got a few people pregnant through etsy forum posting! OK, one of them might have been a dude but we were hopped up on Lucky Lager and levityinbrevity’s cookies. We are saving our money for a couple of levityinbrevity special requests. We will need a couple of training dresses for Hairy and Poppa McSpecies to wear as they prepare to qualify for the upcoming 2012 Olympics three-legged race in London! We will also need a matching dress for Oliver McSpecies to finally match his father. (pending DNA test results)

Our only suggestion is to address the lack of boy's clothes in her shop. Although a pairing of one of her dresses with a high waisted pair of cords for boys would be nothing short of stunning at the next tear fest / clown themed birthday party or maybe that's just our kids' birthday parties? We did however find a great recipe for spiking kids' lemonade with liquor and antidepressants in a Rachel Ray cook book, seems to ease party tension for all involved. By the way, you better make an extra batch for the clown. But we digress ...

So you see? We’ve taken you all through the process of comparing baby making to a shop that makes clothes for girls without feeling the wrath of Corporate McSpecies.

Levityinbrevity can also be found at her blog, myspace and flickr

As always ... HAVE FUN!!

Two great things I found this week

2008-08-23T09:11:00.000-07:00

While driving around I found a sign so amazingly perfect that it almost made me cause an accident. I'm sorry to say that by way of the concrete "Turdles" below and the geographical location we're left to assume it was not intentional. Another out of this world radicool video was brought to my attention by Mike Fairchild aka Mike Fairchild. Listed as the "best fight scene ever" I think it even surpasses the coolness of Rambu and maybe even the king crap The Stabilizer.

Have Fun!

Hairy McSpecies

The truth about Hairy and Olivia Munn

2008-08-20T12:12:00.000-07:00

Okay folks I've been at the Beijing Olympics for the last two weeks so I've not updated the blog or what not by way of limited access. I was surprised to find that all Mixed Species sites are blocked in China, don't know when we crossed over to being a subversive group but we are no less happy to considered as such. While I was there I happened into Olivia Munn, it was kinda awkward to start as we had a torrid affair that lasted near 216 minutes after I was on Attack Of The Show last year (pic above, I'm holding Burla my favorite chicken). We decided to go for dinner after which things heated up real fast. We are both in the public eye a lot so you would think we would know better than falling prey to overwhelming passion while not confined to the privacy of a suite but that was not the case. I awoke to rug burns from my waste to my chin stretched out in the middle of my suite with mayo and sriracha speckled from the floor to the ceiling. Olivia's assistant had long since taken her to an emergency therapy session trying to get her mind straight again before they returned to the states. I glanced an envelope half under my door, inside I found a photo (above) of Olivia having what was left of my tongue for dessert along with the fine pic was a request for money to keep it out of the press. While Olivia may have her own opinion of the gig I could care less and thought it best to put it out myself.

Enjoy and have fun,

Hairy McSpecies

Hot Pounding Artist On Artist Action!! Reviews Least Likely 2 Breed

2008-08-08T10:34:00.000-07:00

Least Likely 2 Breed brings to us a scrumptiously sweet triple layer cake of an Etsy storegasm. Starting with a super cool shop name then treating us to product titles and descriptions that bring rosey cheeks to even Poppa McSpecies. If LL2B was voted Least Likely 2 Breed we would have to contest it as either we've already bred with her or it's time to ask the age old question "got any Mixed Species in ya......".

We predict that Roid Rage The Classiest Flashiest Hemorrhoid Remedy on the Planet will eventually end up being the blue collar workers Blarney Stone. When this vision comes to pass please let any ill informed folk know that it's easier to kiss what's in the can than what's been applied. Corporate McSpecies's roid garden actually sang For He's a Jolly Good Fellow after his first usage. Though the sound was muffled by a fine leather seat but he felt it added a sense of urgency to the piece.

Another back door surprise crowning from Least Likely 2 Breed's glistening soft pelt is the Bad Ass Booty balm (diaper ointment). Of which was not only featured in the May 2008 issue of PREGNANCY magazine but we have it on good authority was also given in gift baskets at the last Jerry Springer family show "Adult Babies and the trans that love them". This balm doubles as an ass shoe horn when Poppa McSpecies dawns his youth sized silver stretch pants, Leslie eat your heart out.

Now don't let this lead you to think Least Likely 2 Breed is an all fudge shop, not at all she accommodates where lemonade is made also! Mother Effers Va-J-J Jelly is no pussys lube or um well, weenies or suckers uh scratch that or uh rub, no......Hmmmmmm. See this is kinda hard ooh um difficult for us, I mean she already beat us to "Too dry for a bone?" and "Better than spit" in her Mother Effers product description. I guess suffice it to say we would pick Mother Effers Va-J-J Jelly to smoothe up in ya for any pork session, long or long cause it's just a damn fine can of lube. Not to mention how cool is it to roll home to your mate with a CAN of lube rather than those plastic squirter things.

Moving up the body (less if you wear tie die and pacthouli) we come to Tough Titties Nipple Rub a fine balm if ever there was one. As dudes with kids we have heard intimately the pain nursing moms deal with not to mention no one likes coming away from a loving nibble with a chunk in their mouth. Did you hear that Miss Jay? Whether you're taking em or giving em chunks = bad! Notice the photos (above) of Hairy's enlarged nipple that was taken following the Miss Jay passion attack and the photo taken after treatment with Tough Titties Nipple Rub.

Hands down as in we are on our hands and knees with supple lips up and roids out giving Least Likely 2 Breed five out of five guaranteed once inflamed now soothed stars.

Hairy McSpecies launches myspace page

2008-08-05T09:39:00.000-07:00

Hairy will update his myspace page with photos often and soon create a blog to dish the dirt on the elite glitterati and Hollywood rabble rowsers he rolls with around this big world of ours. Just back from Jamaica's coast with Victoria's Secret (see above pic) he's now off to Iceland hosting a fundraiser for Rendering For Humanity (a nonprofit that turns unwanted mammals to glue for crafters of third world nations). Hairy will also use this page to convey his ardent belief in having fun. Fun and friendship supercedes all!

Keep your eyes peeled for a Hairy McSpecies appearance as a guest judge on America's Next Top Model! We snuck out the above photo from the filming last week, Hairy said about the show "dudes, that scene is total backwoods". Hairy later explained that Twiggy spent the entire shoot attempting to "tapper" (flicking a fellows balls when he's not looking) Nigel Barker while Miss Jay made Hairy puke in his mouth a little on four separate occasions. We have to give kudos to Miss Jay for what ever extremely crass act she came up with as to make any of the MS boys heave is no small feat.

All we have is now, have fun!

quote from Hairy McSpecies circa 1912

Just announced!!!

2008-07-31T12:13:00.000-07:00

Hairy McSpecies will kick off the "Got Mayo?" campaign as lead model and team captain. After many months of deliberation the International Confederation of Mayonnaise Corporations and it's affiliates, the Hydrogenated and Non Vegetable Oils Consortium and Egg Production Layers Anonymous gave Hairy his latest international modeling gig. Rumor has it that the ability to hold near three pounds of mayo in his beard propelled him to the winners podium leaving the likes of Rosie O'Donnell, Brook Burke, Carnie Wilson, Joey McIntyre (NKOTB) and David Hasselhoff thrown to the sides of his wake like rag dolls. Following this photo Hairy licked his face near clean of mayo with his inordinately large tongue and proclaimed "Suck It Robots" to his crestfallen competitors.
Congrats Hairy! The Mixed Species flag has yet to fly as proud as it does today.

HOT Artist ON Artist ACTION #3!

2008-07-27T23:35:00.000-07:00

Mixed Species DOES beaded flowers?!

A Hairy McSpecies Testimonial -

Beautiful night blues and forest greens prance playfully in fields of whimsical pink fuchsia and lilac pedals. Summers mist meets the beaded shores as a brilliant glass sun rises, in the distance an outline appears..... A winged goddess graces a unicorn’s ornately beaded saddle. As the goddess caresses her stead’s horn with her a supple cheek, Hairy McSpecies screams FOREVERFLOWERS! Hairy woke in a cold sweat warmed only by a French Beaded Pink Iris down his Speedo.

Thank you for the memories ForeverFlowers
Love,
Hairy

After checking out ForeverFlowers (we still can’t get over these) we don't think there's a kind of flower or plant she can’t bead. This doesn’t mean we don’t have a couple of beaded plant curve balls to throw at her. A couple of plants we'd like to see beaded would be:

1.) a beaded Venus Fly Trap including a removable beaded fly!
2.) A beaded series of super Blue Green Algae that we could float on a glass of water.

Poppa McSpecies has already expressed interest in ForeverFlowers’ beaded Harley Roses. Our guess is he intends to weave them into his beard as decoration on his next Harley tour up north to visit Hairy McSpecies. We wish we would have had one of her beaded flowers in the corsages for our first prom. It might of increased chances of getting lucky. Although it would of had to overcome being escorted to the prom in the back of mom's Datsun B510 Station Wagon, feathered hair and a date looking like Snuffleupagus!

Speaking of proms, there could be a tremendous “partnership” relationship between prom corsages marketed with bottles of Boone’s Wine in matching colors. Hey, don’t act like you don’t know what we are talking about! With the combination of a beaded corsage and a matching colored bottle of Boones, things might have been a little… better.

FOREVERFLOWERS’ Gothic Beaded Black Roses would make perfect gift for all the current day Goths. Nothing would please our lady Circe Nightshade more than being presented with one of FOREVERFLOWERS beaded black beauties from any of the Mixed Species guys aka The Beholders! Although in a truly experimental art form we would like to see this wonderful beadwork sewn into skin. Think about the beauty, dimension and depth these beads would give any tattoo.

Once again we wrap up this review with another perfect score of five out of five beaded flowers from FOREVERFLOWERS!

-the Mixed Species guys-

HOT Artist ON Artist ACTION #2

2008-07-15T22:12:00.000-07:00

Mixed Species HOT Artist ON Artist PUMPING ACTION!! (with evilmommy)

Oh, you thought you could stump us with this one.

We’ve always known people were crazy about cigar boxes but were never sure why until we took a close look at evilmommy’s etsy shop! Perfectly placed gem stones add balance and pizzazz to these boxes already rich in the odor of honey suckle, lime and musk rat. You can’t go wrong with the Plexi Lid Woodcase (in case your forget what you put in it) and the Saint Luis Rey, Opus X and Heaven Wood (get it?) were some of our favorites

Thank god Evil Mommy's angelic hands of cigar box adornment only go into action after the stogies have been removed. If they didn't we'd probably end up choking a few down along with the gross of Cohiba's we smuggle back from Havana annually. And trust us, it’s much cooler to be a Cigar Smuggler than a Sausage Smuggler …

Face McSpecies recently dared Hairy McSpecies to sport his evilmommy murse (yes – a murse is a man purse) to the local cage fights and though Hairy came back with a torn dress he reassured all that it was caused by the legions of fans fighting for an autograph.

Now perusing all of these fine containers of potentially illegally imported cigars really got us in a Scarface type mood. In fact the” Mixed Species Story” movie scripts we are shopping are more of a mix of Scarface and Dune with a slathering of Deliverance. Anyway, this rationale provided us with a couple of extra product ideas for evilmommy, free of charge from the Mixed Species guys.

Idea #1 – we’d like to see the evilmommy jump on the Hallmark bandwagon with cigar boxes that say a phrase when you open them up. Our two favorites from Scarface would be
-“Say Good Night to the Bad Guy”

and our personal favorite:

-“Your womb is so polluted, you can’t even give me a baby”.

In fact the Mixed guys would give each other the second phrased box ALL day!

Idea #2 – these boxes are so nice (especially the Onyx Reserve) we’d like to suggest evilmommy targets a new audience and sells them to pet mortuaries. We can’t think of a better burial place for Peety the Parakeet than in an Onyx Reserve. In fact, she even has a box called Pony Box which would be perfect if we could reserve 60 for when our pet pony passes. So sublime …. yet serene!

On a scale of guaranteed five out of five stars, we give Evil Mommy five stars

“New and Unproved”
-the Mixed Species guys-

HOT Artist on Artist ACTION!

2008-06-20T22:03:00.000-07:00

OK, here's a new Mixed Species curve ball to throw at you. We have been approached a few times about selling advertising on our blog and thought a fun way to "promote" rather than advertise would be to create positive, purchaseable reviews written Mixed Species style. We’ve decided to offer our craft/art in the form of prose via positive product reviews. If necessary, we can even put a shine on a turd! 6 out of 5 demolition experts agree that reading MIXED SPECIES HOT Artist on Artist Action reviews have changed their lives. For the record, Anderson Soap Company did not purchase this review. We've always been a big fan of Dennis Anderson and his shop and after he recently wore one of our tees in an online Storque article we thought we'd say "thanks"! If interested in purchasing one of our always positive and equally disturbing "reviews", you can contact us at dirtyjackalope@hotmail.com!

First off, in this particular review we have chosen to judge the products we purchased from Dennis Anderson at Anderson Soap Companies based upon four criteria. 1 – Sensation. 2 – Taste (both kinds). 3 – Smell. 4 – Cleaning Power!

Sensation - Anderson Soap Companies products feel so good that we could only ask that their bar soap come with a hole in it …. And maybe some handles.

Taste - We feel the Poor Boy Beer Soap is the perfect product for washing out our children’s mouths! In fact, we can imagine children everywhere working up their best cuss words and lies JUST to get a good taste of many of the Anderson Soap Company’s products. On a different kind of “taste” tangent let us take a moment to talk vegan. Now technically the Mixed Species guys are omnivores but there has got to be some karma points in using Anderson Soap Company’s vegan friendly products. Worst case scenario we break even, as we us their vegan friendly soaps while we eat half a brick of Velveeta cheese during a relaxing shower session. There’s nothing to ease a day’s tension like good soap and a block of pasteurized cheese product.

Smell - The scent possibilities are endless. Be it Peppermint, Blackberry Sage, Hawaiian Lei or Beer the ways to cover up our man musk are too many to count! We are especially excited about a night out on the town, shirts unbuttoned, showing off some man-moss with the faint smell of Anderson Soap Company’s Guinness Beer Soap wafting around us!

Cleaning Power - We will be putting the cleaning power of Anderson Soap Company to be put to the test. After the chemical shower, industrial eye wash and then a shower using the Blackberry Sage soap we expect the burning sensation left from being touched by Hairy McSpecies to be reduced to a pleasant heat!

In conclusion Mixed Species gives Anderson Soap Company five out of five bite marks on a bar of their Tango with Mango soap bar!

*oh – one last idea. Maybe a diagram could be included on the proper way to remove a wayward pube from a bar of soap without wasting any of this soapy goodness under a fingernail.*

-the Mixed Species guys-

PSSSSSST - did you hear?

2008-05-27T09:39:00.000-07:00

We are all gonna die!

Well on that note, we come back to you from a little blogging hiatus. In the meantime, we had an excellent Mixed Species Summit '08 in Seattle and have refocused, recharged and are rolling out more products! This particular tee ... well it just makes us feel good inside.

Here's our very own Face McSpecies showing off one of the many Mixed Species Research & Development Centers around the world. Face made an interesting choice of shirts as well as he sports one of our newest tees. A nice small subtle almost whisper of a print delivers this dire warning. "Did you hear? we are all going to die"

Good times! Well, we Mixed Species guys have known this little fact for a while and live our lives to the fullest. You should too. Plus it's fun to freak the people out who take the time to read the small print on your shirt!

Look for this fine garment in our Mixed Species Etsy shop.

For the Men:
Standard cut Light Blue Gildan Tees in Small, Medium, Large and XL.

For the Ladies:
American Apparel Light Blueclassic girl in Small, Medium, Large and XL

"Bringing the dance to your pants" -the Mixed Species guys-

Our April WINNER IS ......

2008-05-05T10:39:00.000-07:00

Our random prize winner for our April Drawing was Little Killers!

Little Killers is a shop FULL of some of the best vintage clothing we've ever seen! She's also got you covered if you need a vintage creepy clown picture wall hanging with musical wind up nose or a vintage BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Parker Brothers jigsaw puzzle! (Who doesn't?) Furthermore, the kid's line of clothing has us seriously considering making more babies just to outfit them in Little Killers gear! Jooley of Little Killers has the mouth of sailor and a heart of gold! We are happy she won! Check out her bloggings here:

Little Killers Clothing

If you are interested in being one of our monthly random prize drawing winners, be sure to leave an e-mail address we can enter into the monthly shopping spree at Mixed Species HQ and we promise we won't be spamming you. If we send anything it will probably be bacon as it tastes better than spam.

Although spam isn't band when prepared properly ……

-the Mixed Species guys-

The art of leaving good comments and feedback!

2008-04-29T09:07:00.000-07:00

We just wanted to take a minute out of the day and recognize examples of comments or feedback that we enjoy. We all work hard to create, promote and sell our products and ideas. A lot of times it’s the comments and feedback that keep us going along the way. In the “blogosphere” a good comment not only connects you with the person you are leaving the comment for but shares a little about yourself! Here are a few of our favorites.

“Holy Jeez it arrived fast internationally!!!! The only explanation can be that it was it was shot via a rocket fueled, state of the art, and cannon blaster over the Atlantic. I have no doubt a laser guided GPS was also used to guide it directly into my living room. Mixedspecies continues to maintain professionalism however, and I could not detect any traces of gun powder or gasoline smells. I'll be back for more!”

“Do they allow polygamy in Corvallis?”

“I think you guys just made me throw up in my mouth a little!”

Obviously our taste for our favorite comments and feedback will differ from most. Now it’s your turn, take a minute and share one of the feedback/comments your received you enjoyed the most. If you want to take it a step further, leave a comment for us and we’ll do the same for you!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Who was Gary Gygax?!!

2008-04-24T13:45:00.000-07:00

If you don’t know, check out this awesome article on Fantasy is Love:

http://fantasyislove.com/magazine/issue1/garygygax.php

We even got lucky enough to have our Dungeon Master shirt featured in the article.

Looks like those weekends in the basement drinking Jolt Cola and drawing maps on graph paper paid off!

XoXo

-the (semi-chaotic) Mixed Species guys-

Town PUMP Tees

2008-04-21T09:34:00.000-07:00

Obviously our first and foremost objective at Mixed Species is to have fun! Between the four of us we'll never run out of material and situations to make fun of. Our Town PUMP tee is a perfect example. Furthermore, it's yet another exscuse to don the short shorts and ride our scooter while wearing our bedazzled protective eye gear.

I'm a town pump you're a town pump we're all town pumps. This is not for a gas station this is for those of us who get around. We want to be given this shirt cause we're just not strong enough to admit to ourselves why your brother, uncle, father, sister, mom and lots of your friends wake up in our bed.

Stantard cut 100% cotton in small, medium, large and xl.

You can find these shirts available here:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8345655

-the Mixed Species guys-
"Our neighbors love us."

Did Mixed Species join the 700 Club??!!

2008-04-17T12:41:00.001-07:00

Yes we did! The 700 items sold club on Etsy!

We just achieved a milestone of our 700th item sold! Who would of thought a rag-tag group of dudes and a shop full of ass cracks, scary bloody clowns, dudes skating in dresses, beef jerky underwear and 5' colon plushies would of made it this far?

Our first item sold on April 26, 2007. In the middle of June 2007 we were an Etsy Featured Seller. It just shows everyone, you've GOT to stick to your guns. Keep doing what you enjoy the most. If we would of asked anyone ahead of time what they thought of our ideas and business plan, they would of called security. If we can get this far, ANYONE can take it further.

What are the goals you have achieved recently?

-the Mixed Species guys-

"Your friendly gravy sommelier"

Customizeable THANK YOU cards!

2008-04-14T10:59:00.000-07:00

Are you tired of the same old tried and true "Thank You" cards?

Allow us to say what you really want to say for you. Just check the appropriate action you want to give "thanks" for and the corresponding level of "thanks". PRESTO! You've just created one of the most unique "Thank You's" you've ever given! Any way you want to say it .... these cards got your back! This 4 Pack of hand printed goodness comes with four cards and four envelopes bound with a piece of recycled album cover.

Check them out here:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10614880

P.S. - you're welcome.

-the Mixed Species guys-

Brief Jerky - the real story!

2008-04-10T13:08:00.000-07:00

It's been almost a year now since unveiling our first pair of Brief Jerky! Since that day, Brief Jerky has developed an online persona of his own. In fact recently his publicist faxed us a request for a bigger trailer and an appearance in an upcoming Sci-Fi Fantasy movie, but that is another story.

We had joined Etsy in February of '07 and five weeks later began selling. Thing were slow as we didn't really have an established niche for our "artistic" form of shenanigans. We unveiled Colon Pal and things begin to get pretty exciting. In May we were approached by Etsy about being an upcoming featured seller. We had often joked about not fitting very well into the "craftmosphere" of Etsy and that maybe we should create something sewn. One late night in the Mixed Species R&D Center the idea was hatched to try and make a pair of underwear out of slabs of dried jerky. To our own amazement we were well versed in this medium. As we appeared on the front page of Etsy as the featured seller we rolled out the first pair of Brief Jerky! The views went through the roof! We had over 10,000 views in five days. This was getting fun. We were contacted by FHM magazine in the UK and made a special faux fur lined pair for them with a bedazzled lightning bolt on the crotch.

From that moment on, it's been Brief Jerky madness. We've even sold a pair but to be honest we like to think of Brief Jerky as a billboard/car wreck that slows traffic enough to stop and gawk at the other goodies in our shop!

Here you'll find our good friend .... Mr. Brief Jerky in all his glory!

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=6577234

Mixed Species

-Peace n' Bacon Grease-

What happened to Made in America?

2008-04-07T16:50:00.000-07:00

Let’s face it:

-the dollar is getting crushed by the euro.

-Toyotas are made in the U.S. and Fords are made in Mexico.

-The last Superman movie sucked.

-We’ve truly gone global.

Don’t worry we haven’t gone all “Freedom Fry” psycho xenophobic on you! We consider our little etsy shop here global. We LOVE shipping our crazy ideas all over the world.

We were just wondering …

“What happened to Made in America?” Well WE personally print, sew, pour, cast and create all of our ideas right here in America. We hand printed this shirt on an American Apparel tee that was sewn together in the U.S. So kick back and enjoy, Mixed Species will pull the nation out of its slump one tee shirt at a time!

You can find these tees available here:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10678818

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10743698

Mixed Species

"We go there so you don't have to."

And the WINNER IS ....... BombshellBakery / BeadedBombshell!

2008-04-03T10:27:00.000-07:00

That’s right, our random prize winner for our March Drawing was Beaded Bombshell.

She creates unique beaded necklaces, earrings, and rings for the bombshell in us all! (http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5381318) And trust us, there are some BIG bombshells at Mixed Species. You can also find her stirring it up at Bombshell Bakery! (http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5721188) To be honest, we don’t see how she even had time to enter our contest as you can also read her bloggity goodness here.

And Now Ladies And Gentlemen, http://andnowladiesandgentlemen.blogspot.com.

If you are interested in being one of our monthly random prize drawing winners, be sure to leave an e-mail address we can enter into the monthly shopping spree at http://www.mixedspecies.com and we promise we won’t be spamming you. If we send anything it will probably be bacon as it tastes better than spam.

Although spam isn’t band when prepared properly ……

-the Mixed Species guys-

Is it THAT time of the month?

2008-03-31T10:19:00.000-07:00

Yes it IS!

Time for our monthly shopping spree give-away! $20 worth of Mixed Species gear of your choice will be given away each month of this year.

Just go to http://www.mixedspecies.com

Leave us an e-mail address we can enter into a random prize drawing! (and no, this isn't so we can spam your e-mail account!)

-the Mixed Species guys-

HEY, Nice Rack!

2008-03-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

A few years ago we heard that deer were going to be the next "big" thing.

If that’s the case we thought mutant deer-elk-deer should even be bigger! When we first created our "Nice Rack" T Shirts, we thought the name was a funny play on words! After numerous requests to create a women’s line of "Nice Rack" shirts we have happily obliged! Bonus Points for confusing anyone you may know who hunts and will want to know why you have a shirt on with some sort of elk or deer with four back legs and WAY to many horns!

This shirt is available on a Chestnut brown Gildan tee for men and on a chocolate brown American Apparel girl’s tee. You can find them here:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8696056

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8419167

or sign up to win one on our monthly shopping spree giveway at:

http://www.mixedspecies.com

Musically this shirt "pairs" VERY well the song "Burning Beard" by Clutch. We feel the Southern tinged crunchy sounds of Clutch match up well with the Americana symbolism of the deer-elk-deer. Our liquid "pairing" of this shirt would be a case of Miller High Life. The crisp, light beer will be needed to wash down the heavy sounds of Clutch. If anyone gives you grief about Miller High Life just remind them it's the "Champagne of Beers". It says so on the box!

-the Mixed Species guys-

Scary Bloody Clown Napkins!

2008-03-25T10:59:00.000-07:00

Say it:

Scary .... Bloody .... Clown ..... Napkins

Has a nice ring to it doesn’t it? It's almost like those four words have ALWAYS been together. We figured this little product of our imaginations would be a great intro for our Blog. We are not sure why we even created these napkins. We are sure that we needed to see them in all their glory. We've even sold a few. We like how they set the tone as one of our first products for sale on Etsy as to what was to come.

Clowns Clowns Clowns! You wish you could strike your address from their drunk vagrant memory banks after over paying them to terrorize your kids birthday party. Well now you can have them on your napkins too. Nothing would be more scary than waking up from a bad clown dream to wipe your face with a napkin of clown faces and streaks of blood. This 4-Pack of napkins is 100% cotton hand printed with all water base inks. We feel this pack of four napkins is the perfect gift for young children. You can find them for sale here:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8444818

or win them in our monthly shopping spree drawing here:

http://www.mixedspecies.com

-the Mixed Species guys-